the pages unread

I wish ,

he was there, the day i got my results ....

i shouted and took out my phone to call but he's there no more to answer .....

I wish,
He was there, on my 20th birthday ,
i waited from the first wish till the last minute....
he's not there to bless me anymore ....
I wish,

He was there,

on the diwali day, everyone's celebrating ..
while i was just looking at the lights , thinking
why i LIT his funeral .....
I wish,
he was there, the day got i got beaten up,

no one's there to back me up and pat my back and say " i am there for you "

I wish ,

he was there.. to fight for me when they blamed me for nothing.
I wish ,
he was there , whenever i cry the only one who sits beside me,

I wish,
He was there, when they asked me about my career ...
the only one who can say yes to my freedom.......................
 ............................................................................
                          you left me , you left me alone here......
i never thought i was strong ... such strong that i could let you die in my very own hands ....
such strong that, i can live six months with out you .............
but why ,
dad, you know what ?
there are no fevers attacking me anymore.. 

coz they knew i couldn't recover anymore without your care...
  ....
they scold me that " i dont have any goal towards life ""
... they dont know that "" there goals are nothing without you ""
..
From that date to this day ...
how much i die everyday .. to hear your voice ...
...
i cant DAD ... i cant ,,
with out you I can't ...
....
they say life has to move on...
but they never thought how can it move when the life's gone ...
...
I MISS YOU dad.. :(

.........................  Si.Cho